Modeling is a creepy profession. Modeling makes me feel like a piece of dark meat and not a full human being. I feel objectified, but if I want to make it in the entertainment industry I might as well get used to it.
As Ronald Reagan noted:
"Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession.I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first."Back when I was eighteen, I never thought I would ever be a model at twenty-two.
The agency also thinks I would make a good actor, but they say I have to work on my confidence:
"Work out more, practice in front of the mirror, and with other people. And meet more women," these are the things they suggested after my photo shoot and commercial taping.
"How attached are you to the facial hair?" they asked.
"Not very," I replied.
"You'll probably make more money with hair on your head. And you need to smile more," the agents say.
"You have a great look, but you need to overcome your shyness. This is not the industry for shy people."
I have always been shy around women. However, this job is forcing me to come into my own.
I am genuinely nervous because I think too far ahead. I over-think things instead of letting them flow naturally.
I have to work on being smooth like an R&B singer. I speak three languages, one of which is French, so I can also make money doing voice work. Apparently I have a nice speaking voice.
It is something I will definitely tell my grandkids about one day. All I care about is making money these days. I am on my grind. I do not have time for dating or partying.
I have had so many photographs taken of me, it is surreal. I never thought I was attractive in high school or ever really. I am still really a kid at heart and a nerd.
I do not understand what makes my face, body, or persona marketable at all. I guess I have to figure it out.
I have offers to do print work in New York, but I have turned them down for now. I am just doing this as a side hustle. I cannot let it consume my life.
I have two tattoos, one on my left chest and another between the shoulder blades. However, I am nervous that the agency will frown on this body art.
If I ever run for office, I will definitely get my tattoos removed, but for now I enjoy them. Oh, and I need to experience sex. This gig actually inspires me to learn poses and practice my Zoolander face.